Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Oct 12th

October 12th, I will go to Austin to speak my peace before the Texas Medical Board, about my surgery "incident", and Doctor Floyd will be in attendance. The hearing will decided if disaplinary action should be taken against him. (him losing his license). I have not spoken to him, nor him to me since my last day in the hospital in Dumas...We have seen each other in passing in Dumas simce. I have so many emotions connected to this. Fear, relief, hope, (that it will bring closure) nervous....and so many more. One of those times you just want to lock yourself in a room and cry.....I find myself already thinking about it any time I have a spare moment. Such as now. I can't wait to let it all out, yet I know that no one can even begin to comprehend what our family went through...and still goes through, no matter how much explaining is done. Will it bring closure....will it stir it all up to much again, or will it be a tolerable mix of both??? I have decided not to rehearse, or even think about what I am going to say that day. I am praying God will give me the words that day.......and I have faith that he will!!

This the lyrics to this song....are soooo exactly how I feel...I couldn't put it any better!

So damn easy to say that life's so hard....Every body's got their share of battle scars....As for me I'd like to thank my lucky stars that I'm alive and well....It'd be easy to add up all the pain....And all the dreams you've sat and watch go up in flames...Dwell on the wreckage as it smolders in the rain...But not me... I'm alive.And today you know that's good enough for me...Breathing in and out's a blessing can't you see....Today's the first day of the rest of my life...And I'm alive and well....I'm alive and well